“What all my work shall be, I don’t know that either, every hour being a stranger to you until you live it. I want a busy life, a just mind and a timely death.” Zora Neale Hurston
Dear Livejournal Readers:
I’ve not been very attentive to this blog; no, not one bit. For you see, while my life was busy before, it has gotten much busier. I have rediscovered the world of academics, and I’m wallowing among dusty bookshelves and musty books, looking at my ink-stained fingertips and remembering what it was like to be young and filled with . . . possibility.
Not that I’m old, not by any means. I’m just not as young anymore. Magical potions and charms can erase lines, but they can’t erase time. And now that I’m stuffed in a classroom for hours on end with students who could all be my sons and daughters, I’m feeling regretful. I could have done all this years ago. I should have done all this years ago. But my own doubts and fears got in the way; and I was burdened in life with parents who, truly, tried to destroy every dream I ever dreamed. Even now, as I write this I can hear my mother’s voice, “You’re not as smart as you think you are,” and my adoptive father’s taunts, “You’ll never amount to anything no matter how many books you read.”
It took me decades to realize that I was smarter than I thought I was; and after reading every book I could get my hands on, I wrote a few of my own. Still, somehow I lost sight of the one thing in the world that can lift each and every person higher than the generations that came before – education.
Now I’m back in the classroom. Add to this the long nights spent taking care of sick people, the manuscripts on which I am working, and the day-to-day activities of living . . . and I have no time for anything beyond myself.
I’m loving every minute of it.
That’s all I wanted to write here. If it seems my journal grows cold between entries, it’s because I’m entering the next phase of my development – I’m getting an education. Honestly, it’s something more of us in this religion need to do. We have opportunities our ancestors never had. We need to take advantage of each and every one of them.